Supporting a young person into adulthood

Alongside her Shared Lives role, Angela has been a foster carer for the past 10 years. She also worked as a debt coach for her local foodbank, helping people manage debt, understand benefits and navigate financial challenges. 

The path into Shared Lives came through a young person she had already been supporting. 

Carl came to live with Angela and her family at the age of 16. As his 18th birthday approached, neither he nor Angela felt ready for the support to come to an end. 

The family explored the option of Staying Put, which supports care-experienced young people who are not yet ready to live independently. However, Angela felt that Shared Lives offered a long-term solution. 

Before becoming a Shared Lives carer, Angela admits she had some misconceptions about who the service was for. “Carl is autistic and has ADHD, so we weren’t sure he would meet the threshold,” she says. Thankfully, they discovered that Shared Lives could provide exactly the kind of support Carl needed as he moved towards adulthood and independence. 

Today, much of Angela’s time is spent supporting Carl to take important steps towards his future. One of their current focuses is supporting him to access education, driving him there and developing confidence for him to drive alone. 

These everyday journeys have become opportunities for growth, confidence-building and independence. “Carl is starting to gain in confidence especially with being able to access education, which is really positive and means that he will be able to progress and hopefully live independently in the future,” says Angela. 

Angela describes Carl as funny, caring and witty, with a love of cars, computers and 1990s dance music. She says, “he’s great company and has great taste in 90s dance music!” Their shared interests often lead to outings together, including visits to classic car shows. 

For Angela, one recent experience perfectly captures what being a Shared Lives carer means. Carl had wanted to attend a 90s music festival, something that felt like a significant step given his anxieties. Together, they planned the trip and attended the event. Although they didn’t stay as long as they had hoped, Angela saw it as a huge success.  

At first, Carl felt disappointed. But later, they reflected on the experience together and focused on what he had learned. He realised he preferred outdoor events to indoor venues and enjoyed evening events more than daytime ones. “This was a positive experience of trying something new and taking the positives from it, even if it did not go exactly as planned,” says Angela. 

For Angela, these moments of self-discovery and personal growth are incredibly rewarding. “I really love the opportunity of supporting a young person at the start of their journey to independence.” 

Angela has experienced different expectations around care, boundaries and finances between Shared Lives and foster care, which has been a transition process to navigate. Despite those challenges, Angela says the rewards far outweigh the difficulties. “There is nothing better than supporting another person to reach their potential and seeing them thrive.” 

The impact has been life-changing for everyone involved. 

Outside of her caring role, Angela enjoys dancing, listening to music and playing in a samba band. As a mother of two adult sons, she brings both personal and professional experience to her role, alongside a decade of fostering knowledge and training. 

Looking ahead, she hopes to travel more, and she and Carl are already planning a road trip to Poland in the coming years. 

For anyone considering becoming a Shared Lives carer, Angela encourages them to think about it as a way of life, opening up their household and family. She believes that while experience can help, it is not the most important thing. “As long as you have the right intentions, experience will come with time.” 

While Shared Lives is a significant commitment, she sees that as one of its greatest strengths. “The person becomes part of your life, and the local Shared Lives family is broad, friendly and welcoming. It is great to become part of a community with other carers too.” 

*names changed throughout 

If you’re a foster carer transitioning to Shared Lives, find out more about our Shared Lives for young people leaving care programme which includes resources and FAQs for foster carers. 

This Shared Lives Week support us to ‘Shout about Shared Lives’ and ‘tell one person’ to raise awareness of Shared Lives.