From isolation to gold medals – J’s transformation celebrated in Scottish Learning Disability Week

J experienced a difficult start in life marked by early rejection and instability. Those experiences left him angry and withdrawn, and he became involved in drugs and negative influences. “I used to feel like people didn’t want me around,” he said. “Like no matter what I did, I was always made to feel like I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t belong.”

By the time he was referred to Dumfries and Galloway Shared Lives, J had no close friends, little contact with family, and had been repeatedly turned away from opportunities because of his behaviour. Placed with Shared Lives carers in Stranraer, he withdrew almost completely, spending most of his time alone. But his carers met his anger with calm, his silence with patience, and his self-doubt with belief.

Before the Covid-19 pandemic, J had begun engaging with others, managing his emotions, and trying new experiences. But lockdown brought a setback. The closure of community groups hit hard and attempts to re-join social settings were met with further rejection.

His Shared Lives carers worked to keep him moving forward, securing medical support and encouraging him to re-engage. The turning point came when J joined a mainstream bowling club. There, he was welcomed as a teammate rather than judged for his past. Encouraged by new friends, he began playing Boccia — and his talent quickly shone through.

Earlier this year, J won three gold medals at the Disability Games in Stirling. His success led to an invitation to represent Scotland in bowls – a remarkable achievement for someone once written off by so many. “I never thought I’d be good at anything,” J said. “But now I’ve got medals, I’ve got pals, and I’ve got something to get up for.”

Alongside sport, J discovered a passion for woodworking at the local Men’s Shed. He crafts tables, benches, and shelving from timber he selects himself, often gifting them to friends and community groups. A Men’s Shed member said: J’s energy and enthusiasm are contagious. He’s become a core part of the group — we’re lucky to have him.”

His Shared Lives carers say the change in J has been extraordinary. “Watching him get excited about his next project or bowling session — that’s the kind of progress you can’t measure in charts.”

Today, J is unrecognisable from the young man who once barricaded himself in his room, certain the world had no place for him. His journey – from rejection to recognition, from silence to self-expression, embodies the message of Scottish Learning Disability Week – “I Am Here.”

For more information on Scottish Learning Disability Week, visit Scottish Learning Disability Week 2025 

If J’s story has inspired you to become a Shared Lives carer, visit www.startyoursharedlife.today.