“It’s about finding out what matters to each person”: how Deanne is making a difference through Live More

Before becoming a Shared Lives carer, Deanne worked in a range of support roles, including outreach work and supported placements for young people and care leavers. She also had experience supporting family members living with dementia.

When PossAbilities introduced the Live More pilot, she immediately put her name forward. “It was mentioned at one of our quarterly Shared Lives meetings that there was a pilot scheme coming up,” she said. “They explained what it would involve and asked if anyone was interested. I expressed my interest straight away.”

“I felt confident enough to do it,” she said. “I like the different aspects of Shared Lives. New challenges and new training are important because not everybody’s the same. It gives you more life experience.”

As part of Live More, Deanne completed dementia training and began supporting people living with dementia across Rochdale.

One of the first things Deanne noticed was that many of the families coming into Live More were very different from people she had supported previously. “When you work with people with a learning disability, often they’ve been involved with support services for most of their lives,” she explained. “But when it’s an older person or somebody who’s never been involved with support before, families can be a bit reluctant.”

Many were suddenly dealing with dementia and unsure where to turn. “Some might feel like they’re failing,” she said. “But they don’t know where to go or what to do for the best.”

Building trust is always the first step. “I reassure them about how I work and what they would like from me,” she said. “I always say we can take it slowly. Just do a couple of hours and see how it goes and build up that relationship.”

Through Live More, she supports three women, each with different interests and personalities.

One woman, in her eighties, lives at home while her daughter continues to work. Some days she has plenty of energy and enjoys getting out. “She loves shopping and she loves the market,” Deanne said. “I’ll pick her up and we’ll go out.” Other days look very different. “If she’s tired or sleepy, I’ll make her some lunch, sit with her while she eats, make her a cup of tea.”

For another woman, who lives with her husband and is in her sixties, the support focuses more on getting out into the community and helping maintain independence. Her husband was initially anxious about letting someone else support his wife. “He was very reluctant to let go,” Deanne said. “Very worried.” But that changed over time. “His confidence in me now has just totally changed.”

The third woman Deanne supports lives alone. “She’s very independent,” said Deanne. “But she’s also very vulnerable.” Support can involve practical tasks such as shopping, attending appointments and helping her stay organised.

For Deanne, no two people need the same support. “It’s about finding out what matters to each person,” she said. “What they enjoy, what helps them and what gives them confidence.”

Over time, Deanne says she sees families become more confident and reassured. Many start out feeling anxious about accepting support from someone new. But once trust develops, the difference can be significant. “To gain that confidence is huge,” she said.

Families know they have someone they can turn to. The people she supports have regular opportunities to get out, stay active and continue enjoying the things that matter to them. Those relationships are at the heart of what makes Shared Lives work. “It’s about being there for people,” she said. “Just supporting them and helping them carry on with their lives.”

Deanne says the role is incredibly rewarding. “I love my job,” she said. “Just making a difference to somebody’s day can mean so much.” Success isn’t measured in big milestones. It’s something much simpler. “Even if I get one smile a day,” she said. “That’s my job done.”

As Live More grows, we need more people like Deanne to step forward. You don’t need experience – just time, patience and an interest in people. With the right support, you can help people living with dementia stay connected to the people, places and routines that matter most, while giving families the support they need to keep going.

Find out more: Live More: growing Shared Lives for people living with dementia and their families.

Please note: This story is illustrated using an image from the Centre for Ageing Better image library and does not feature the people described in the story.